In counselling, I often see people grappling with big decisions. Should I go back to university? End this relationship—or stay and fight for it? Leave a job that’s draining me—or stick it out for security? These decisions can feel paralyzing.

Why? Because we crave certainty. We want to know what the “right” choice is. But here’s the tricky part: the ‘right’ thing doesn’t exist.

Life isn’t a map with a clearly marked path. It’s a foggy, winding road, and your purpose? It reveals itself to you incrementally, step by step, as you move forward.

Think of it like this:
The young boy wants wisdom. He wants to know how to live, how to make the right decisions, how to avoid mistakes and suffering. He dreams of clarity and answers.

The old man, however, wants time. Time to go back, to live again—to really experience the beauty he was too busy to notice, to revel in the small joys of being alive.

But life doesn’t give you both. The trade-off is stark: time and ignorance, or wisdom and no time.

As Kierkegaard so powerfully said:
“Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.”

So if you’re standing in the midst of indecision, feeling the weight of not knowing—good. That discomfort means you’re alive to life’s most profound questions. It means:

(a) You’re asking the right questions.
(b) You’re brave enough to sit with the existential dread that comes from confronting the uncertainty of existence—a gift only the courageous are willing to receive.

Here’s the truth: Purpose isn’t a destination, and it’s not handed to you in a neat little box. It’s a slow unfolding, a process that demands patience, curiosity, and trust.

So take heart. That knot in your chest, that restlessness in your mind? Those are signs you’re on the path. Keep asking, keep moving forward, and trust that each step reveals a little more of what you’re here to do.

What’s your relationship with not knowing? How do you navigate the tension between seeking answers and embracing the mystery?